Mass Pairing In the Style of
by Frequent Fandom Hopper
Summary: Adventure Time! My favorite pairings all put together in a collection of unrelated oneshots! Rated T for minor sexual content and possible language.


_**Finnonna-**_Finn and Fionna

* * *

On a normal day on what used to be known as Earth (Antebellum (before war)-The Great Mushroom War-Name), There was to be a great Hero's convention right smack in the middle of the edge of the Great Mirror. You see, Ooo may have been what was left after the War, but what they hadn't known for a while was there was a gigantic magic mirror. You could walk through the mirror and not be affected… sort of… (Side affects may include: Nausea, Heartburn, Indigestion, Upset stomach, Diarrhea, Drowsiness, Dizziness, and obviously, Banana come-uppance (Bananas finding there way through whatever crevices you have))

ANYWAY!

Our Favorite adventurer and adventuress will be there, of course! They came to listen to the silversmith talk _right_ on the border about his greatest forged silver melee weapons. He'll also auction off his finest piece of work.

Being prepared, both Finn and Fionna ask Jake and Cake to carry a bunch of coins so they can get the sword.

We'll follow Finn first. He and Jake go through the flap of the HUMONGOUS tent and see some fellas testing their strength, others fencing, more showing off their muscles, and there are few female 'heroes' to see, but there was one looking at a display of cheap, rusty, used swords. And Finn could tell they weren't worth what they were selling for. He led them deeper into the cluster of adventurers and passed a few interesting displays, but none compared to what the Silversmith sounded like. He was described as a tall brawny man with little vocabulary and a rough-n-tough beard! Finn couldn't wait to see the guy he was gonna buy a silver mystery weapon from! Jake and Finn each took a seat, Finn sat patiently but anxiously as he waited for the lecture to begin about "How to forge the perfect weapon from silver," which was written crudely on a cardboard box sitting on stage. He sat and he sat and he sat and he sat…

Now we can follow Fionna! She had Cake stretch them over the sea of muscular girls that blocked their way to the most exciting lecture that waited for them with a prize at the end! A mysterious silver melee weapon that she could totally use to fluff the stuff out of some freaky freak monsters that dared cross her path! Cake sat her down _one _seat away from Finn, her supposed mirror person. She didn't recognize him until she noticed a page that was torn from the Enchiridion sticking out of his backpack. She knew it was the same page she tore out because it was always sticking out of her pack too. (And she may have memorized its every detail, front, back, sides, and corners) She stared for a minute trying to decide what resemblance she has with him and couldn't see it. She turned her head right before Cake started talking to her.

"Oooh, baby! I'm so glad we didn't have cross the Great Mirror border into Ooo. I don't want anymore bananas coming out of my tail-tip anymore! Never again!" Fionna smirked at that and turned when the box on staged tipped off and a small, well-dressed Peppermint Butler was in its place.

"Hello," he said in that voice that I can't describe, "and welcome to the first ever Adventure Exposition to be held on both sides of the border! Today's special guest is Slerbin Dreemyuul, talking about making weapons with silver!" He walks backward off to the right of the stage as Slerbin comes out the other end. This wasn't how he was supposed to look at all!

This man-or better said _boy_- was short and scrawny! He was also wearing glasses and his chin barely had any stubble. _Maybe he just shaved? His beard and his height? And eyes?_ Finn thought hopefully, but he didn't hope hard enough because that was REALLY the famous silversmith.

The four adventure-ridden characters sat through a 4 minute (speech which seemed like an hour) about silver. Slerbin skipped showing them how to make a weapon and went on to auction off his perfect silver mystery weapon.

Of course, it was a sword. But it was a super tiny sword. The four were the last left in the audience, most driven away by the lacking little gremlin's appearance on stage, the rest either left during the speech or because they were hoping for a different weapon to be auctioned. The bidding began and Fionna kicked it off with 20 gold pieces. Finn followed up with 40 gold pieces. Fionna bit back with 80 gold pieces, but her gender-swap was quick to raise the bid all the way to a high-and-mighty, hard-to-beat 85 gold pieces. And a ruby. Fionna offered a diamond and 90 gold pieces. They both really wanted the sword, and were willing to spend all they brought. Finn bid 3 diamonds, a ruby and 100 gold pieces. He only had 3 diamonds, a ruby and 99 gold pieces, but it wasn't like Slerbin would count them, right?

Fionna threw her hands up and said, "I don't have enough gems to beat that! Yeah, okay, sold!"

"Sold!" Dreemyuul said. "Sold to the boy with an awful lot of precious gems with him!"

As Finn and Jake celebrated and gave the man his pays, Fionna stalked off, stuffing a shrunken Cake into her hat. She stormed out into a light drizzle with the bag of riches slung over her shoulder.

After she took the time to cool off, Fionna strolled back in, leaving Cake to finish burying the bag she had so she could enjoy herself. Now, Fionna couldn't remember why she was so mad in the first place.

Finn was looking around the big area without noticing that he crossed the mirror. Minding his own business, Finn wandered around until he stopped once he saw Marceline floating above. He blushed because she was wearing an off-character outfit. Red short-shorts and a puffy pink shirt that was too big for her. Finn hadn't noticed he was still walking and wasn't paying attention and bumped into someone. He toppled over and his backpack spilled everywhere. He looked up to see who he bumped into and hardly recognized his gender-swapped character that he heard so much about. _Pretty…_ He thought. Still blushing, he began to scoop things into his pack. She had the same pack as he did, but a tiny bit smaller. He noticed his hat on the floor behind him and shoved it on his head. _Huh?! It's really tight! And where's Jake?_

Fionna stuffed her things into her pack and snatched up her hat and shot up quickly. Cake was out of sight! The guy she ran into seemed to be familiar now. He was Finn. Now that she wasn't mad, he seemed more attractive… But she didn't like ANYBODY. She couldn't, right? Taking another look at his hat made her realize that she picked up the wrong one! No wonder it was too big for her head. Her hair was hanging out of it too. He yanked it off his head and held it.

"Sorry." He was blushing uncontrollably.

"Yeah, me too." She was too.

"I… I can make it up to you. I know this cool swords display on my side of the Mirror Border. Wanna see?"

"Y-yeah. Sure." He leads her to the other side and they look at the cheap, rusty swords that were selling for high prices.

Fionna yawned. "I'm really tired. I think it's 'cause I crossed. I should really go soon." She yawned again.

"You don't have to go. You can uh… stay with me and Jake. There's enough room for you to take a nap. Maybe we can hang out like, after you wake up?"

"Yeah," She yawns, "That'd be cool." And she falls over. She lands on her side and conks out.

Not knowing what to do, Finn awkwardly grabs her ankles and drags her out of the tent. He calls Jake and he appears by his side immediately.

"What is it man?! You sound spooked!" Jake says worried.

"Can you look for Cake, your mirror buddy? We have to tell her that Fionna wants to hang in Ooo for a while, but she wants to nap it up first."

(Let's follow Jake really quick…)

"Cake! Caaake! Oh, there you are." He almost doesn't recognize her since she has a blue hat on and a matching t-shirt that says ADVENTURE on it. She was also holding a sequin milkshake.

"Wh-what do you want, D-dog?" she says, her tail fluffed out.

"I wanna tell you that Fionna wants to hang around Ooo for a little longer, but she got side-affected from the Mirror. She's gotta nap it off."

"Ok. I'll just stay on my side of the Mirror then. Tell her if she needs me that I'll be with Lord Monochromicorn! I'm coming to meet you at the border in the morning. And tell that Finn that I don't want any funny business going on while my back is turned!"

"Alright. Bye!" And Jake stretches off to tell Finn the message.

(Back to Finnonna)

(Ok, already at the tree house)

Jake Carried Fionna on his back (in the shape of a large crib, so she wouldn't fall off) the way back to the tree and dumped her on the couch when they arrived. After Finn came back down the ladder with some wolf fur to give her as a blanket, she was already up and stretching. She suggested seeing the Candy Kingdom first, but Finn wanted to try something a little more romantic. It was okay to make a move on her because they weren't related, right? But what moves does he have? Stuttering. And freezing. He'll have to wing it.

When they arrived at Choose Goose's stall, Fionna was fully pumped and ready for anything! She asked specifically for a treasure map. Choose Goose chose a puzzling riddle for them to solve.

"A treasure map is what you seek, but help me now: I think I reek! Everybody runs, everybody hides. Help me now, and help my pride!"

"Easy," Fionna answered him, "just bathe or something."

"Really? Is that all?"

"Yeah, man." Finn held out his palm. "If you think you smell bad, just was that toosh of yours and you'll be all set!"

"Thank-you, thank-you! Here you go a treasure map for two!" CG handed them a triangle-shaped map and they set off to find the treasure.

Once they moved in a complete triangle, they stopped at the x on the map.

"This is it. We made it to the end." Finn looked around. "But I don't see any treasure. All I see is CG's cart," he looked disappointed as he walked up to the goose. "Where's the treasure, Choose Goose? We followed the map all the way back here."

"Now it is the treasure you want, so here you are: a cleaver from the man who is seriously gaunt!" He reached around the shelf and pulled out a huge cleaver made out of silver. Fionna took it without hesitation.

"WOAH! THIS BLADE IS WAY FATTER THAN A REGULAR SWORD! Thanks for the weapon, CG!" and they walked off. Jake said his goodbye (yeah, he was here the whole time) and took off to see Lady and the pupsicorns.

Finn goes, "Sooo… you wanna go back to the tree house and look at stars or whatever?" He was braving up and his voice only shook a little. _I can do this!_

"Yeah, sure. Sounds fun," Fionna says coolly. _Yes! I didn't sound like a total idiot!_

So as they sit on the treetop, Finn points up to show Fionna shapes he sees in the stars. "There's a triangle," he pointed to a collection of 7 stars… "And that's a, uh… trapezoid!" It was what we know as Orion.

"Really?" Fionna said, impressed by his ability to name the constellations. "That's math. You are like, really smart. I mean, PG is way smarter, but I've never heard him name any constitutions before!" (We all know she meant constellations…) She turned to him and they both blushed.

"So…"

"Yeah, so…"

"Oh! Here!" Finn reached inside his pack and pulled out something shiny. When Fionna could see what it was, she was bursting with joy!

"Is that for… me?!" It was the most dazzling thing she had ever seen. Nothing could be more beautiful than it. She pictured herself with it and couldn't wait until she could show it off to Cake!

"Yeah, I was trying to save it for later, but I thought I'd give it to you now."

"Dude! This is sooo MATH!" She took the small shimmering object from him and slashed the air with it.

Did you think it was a ring? NERP! It was the little itty bitty sword that Finn got from the auction!

"Thanks so much! I love it! And here-" She reached in her pack and pulled out the fat and short blade that she got from CG earlier. "You can have this."

"Th-thanks." They both sat there blushing away and as they were caught in the moment, BOOM! Kiss!

At first a small peck then a forceful, passionate kiss. They lay there on top of the tree just mackin' on each other until the sun rose up. Fionna fell asleep in Finn's arms. He held her as if their lives depended on it. As Finn woke several hours later, he woke Fionna with a peck on the forehead.

"Good morning!" She stretched. Then alarm surged through her like she was being electrocuted. "OH GLOB! OH GLOBBING GLOBITZ! CAKE! Cake's gonna freak out! She wanted to meet at the Mirror in the morning!"

"Please, don't panic! I-I wanna spend more time with you before you leave!"

"Why can't you just come to Aaa with me then?"

"That's a great idea! Let's just tell Jake first." They made their ways down the ladder to see Jake singing and cooking. (Bacon Pancake song) "Hey, Jake?" Finn says over his best friend's voice.

"Huh? Oh Glob! I thought you were already gone! Cake is gonna get real fierce on us! Fionna wa supposed to be home a long time ago!"

"What time is it now?!" Fionna rushed. She HATED getting lectures from Cake about her sense of time.

"Well I dunno."

"what do you mean you don't know!?"

"I guess it's like 2 or 3 in the afternoon."

"WE'VE GOTTA GO _**NOW**_!"

"Hey, Jake! I'm going to Aaa…" His voice faded away while Fionna dragged him away from the tree house and towards the Great Mirror.

Cake wasn't anywhere to be seen when they stepped through the mirror. They continued on to the tree house and found Cake asleep in her drawer.

"Who?!- Oh, Fionna! I am so sorry! I was out late with Lord Monochromicorn. We left the kittichromicorns with a Gumball and that darn Marshall Lee let them run free so we had to chase them down. And-" She stopped cold when she noticed Finn was standing in the doorway. "Hello. Thanks for dropping her off. You can go now."

"Huh? Oh, sorry. I'm kind of dizzy and really tired. Can I…" he dropped flat on the floor so the heroine had to drag him down to the couch. She climbed down, pushed he couch underneath the ladder and told cake to roll him down. He fell down the hole that was above the ladder, bounced off the couch, and rolled into the kitchen. Fionna had to drag him back to the couch and left him there to play BMO with Cake. She couldn't help glancing over to see Finn's gorgeous baby-angel face while he slept. Seeing him caused her to lose every round of Robot Pillow Fight to Cake.

The cat left again to see how her kittichromicorns were settling back in the barn and left the adventurers alone. Finn woke up groggy and noticed Fionna passed out on the floor with a pillow and blanket. He rolled off the couch and wrapped his arms around his heroine. She woke and turned so her face was buried in his chest. They became one big mass of blue and white with their backpacks sprawled across the floor.

This felt right. They had the time of the world and spent it cuddling together. Fionna looked up at her hero. They kissed passionately, rolled around for a few minutes and decided that Cake could walk in at any moment. Plus neither of them understood how to do it since they were just, like, 14.

They lay there cuddling and forgetting the world together. Nothing brings two people together like a weapon exchange.

*Sigh* Love. Where does it end?

Nowhere.

As far as you know.


End file.
